The decision to move your parent into Aged Care can often come with a lot of emotion, uncertainty, and a heavy sense of responsibility. If you have been a full-time carer for elderly parents for example, you’ve likely faced numerous challenges already, but packing up the family home can be one of the most difficult steps in this journey. The process is not just about logistics; it’s about managing the deep emotional ties your family has to your parent’s home while ensuring their transition is as smooth and gentle as possible.
Preparing for the transition
Starting the conversation early is key. Talking to your ageing parents about the possibility of moving into Aged Care might feel uncomfortable, but it’s helpful to address it well before it becomes urgent, if possible. This allows everyone involved to process the idea gradually, reducing stress and anxiety when the time comes.
Understanding the emotional attachment your parent has to their home is important. A house is not just a physical space; it’s a repository of memories, milestones, and personal history. And let’s not forget that you most likely have your own feelings about letting go of the family home too!
We suggest setting realistic timelines for the move and approach the task with patience. This way, nobody will feel rushed or pressured, so feelings of loss won’t be exacerbated.
Involving your parent in the process
One of the most effective ways to ease the transition is to involve your parent in the decision-making process. Allow them to have a say in what items they want to keep, donate, or discard. This not only gives them a sense of control but also ensures they don’t feel like decisions are being made for them without their input.
Encourage your parent to prioritise items that hold the most significance for them. While they might not be able to take everything, knowing that their most cherished possessions will come along can give them some comfort. While their decisions might not be the same that you would make, it can help to respect their wishes throughout the process, ensuring they feel heard and respected. This is a delicate time, and their emotional wellbeing should be at the forefront of every decision.
Sorting and organising
Sorting through a lifetime’s worth of belongings can be overwhelming, but breaking the process down into manageable steps can make it feel more manageable. You might like to start by tackling one room at a time, focusing on areas that hold the least sentimental value first. This helps build momentum and makes the larger tasks feel less daunting.
As a support for your elderly parents, you can lead them through the decluttering process by creating using the three categories mentioned earlier:
- items to keep
- items to donate
- items to discard.
And while it’s important to be mindful of your parent’s attachment to certain items, you can also encourage them to let go of things they no longer need or use. This step is as much about creating space for new memories as it is about parting with the old. Having that positive, forward-looking attitude can make everyone feel more comfortable.
Handling sentimental items
Sentimental items can be the most challenging to sort through, and they are often where you might come up against resistance or conflict. These are the objects that hold deep personal meaning – items like photographs, letters, souvenirs from family holidays. When dealing with these, it’s important to tread carefully and with love.
Another strategy we suggest is to create memory boxes or photo albums that can be brought with your parent to their new Aged Care Residence. This way, your parent can still have a tangible connection to their past without being overwhelmed by a huge volume of items. If there are items that are too large or impractical to move, such as pieces of furniture, discuss the possibility of passing them on to other family members, where they can visit. This can be a way to preserve the legacy of the home within the family.
Practical tips for packing
When it comes to the actual packing, using the right materials and techniques can make a big difference. Sturdy boxes, bubble wrap, and packing paper are essential for protecting fragile items. Clearly label each box with its contents, which will make the unpacking process much easier.
On moving day, it’s helpful to have a clear plan in place. Arrange for the moving company to arrive early, and ensure that your parent’s essentials are packed separately and are easily accessible in a suitcase for example with them and you. This includes things like medication, a change of clothes, and any items that provide comfort, such as a favourite blanket or book.
Managing emotional stress
The emotional toll of moving your parent into Aged Care cannot be understated. It’s important to acknowledge and address both your parent’s feelings and your own. This is a significant life change, and it’s natural to feel a mix of emotions – from relief to sadness and everything in between. There’s no right or wrong way to feel, so give yourself a break and some space to process it all.
Transitioning with TriCare
At TriCare we make sure your parent is welcomed as soon as they arrive, and we check in with them regularly to ensure they settle in and feel comfortable in their new home. We welcome you to come and spend plenty of time with them, and get to know their new surroundings. You’re welcome to join your parent for meals and activities, or just to be with them in their room while they get used to everything. And, of course, we welcome any feedback or suggestions you have for us to help your parent to feel comfortable and relaxed.
Seeking support from family, friends, or even professional counsellors can also be helpful for you during this time. You may have been acting as a full-time carer for your elderly parents, and this change can be a big one for you to – it’s okay to ask for help. Balancing practicality with emotional care is important, so you can ensure your parent’s transition is as smooth as possible for your parent and for you.
Packing up the family home is more than just a list of tasks; it’s a journey through the past and a step towards a new chapter. By approaching the job with empathy, patience, and a clear plan, you can help your parent move into Aged Care with dignity and peace of mind. Focus on creating a positive and comfortable environment in their new home, and remember that while the surroundings may change, the love and care you provide never changes.
Don’t forget moving your ageing parents into Aged Care is never easy for anyone, but with the right approach, it can be a positive move for all involved. The memories created in the family home will always hold a special place, and now, it’s time to create new ones in a space where they can continue to thrive.
Want to learn more about Aged Care at TriCare? Call our Aged Care Specialist team on
1300 874 2273 or click on the link below to get in touch.
